Blood Noir (Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter, Book 16) Reviews

• Bloody bad "Noir"

  
  By A1D2C0WDCSHUWZ on 2008-05-28
  Imagine the horribly malformed love-child of "Days Of Our Lives," Anne Rice and some really bad Mary Sue fan fiction.
  
  That is the most accurate description I can think of for "Blood Noir," the fifteenth novel in the Anita Blake: Vampire Hunter series. Since it's a rather lame little novella pumped up to novel size, Laurell K. Hamilton spins up artificial drama and endless sexual angst that never really goes anywhere or does anything, but fills up plenty of pages. By the end, you'll be wondering what the point is.
  
  Werewolf stripper Jason drops by Anita's house to whine that his estranged dad is dying, and he's broken up with his girlfriend because she wanted monogamy. Three guesses which is considered more traumatic -- monogamy or cancer.
  
  So Anita comforts him the only way she knows how, and then agrees to pose as his girlfriend so he can prove to his dad that he isn't gay. Apparently his family is more worried about his sexuality than about his being a werewolf. But when they arrive, Anita finds that Jason is one of several look-alike men in his hometown, and one of them is a wealthy engaged stud who is having an affair with the wife of a local Master vampire. This, needless to say, stokes up lots of bad feelings.
  
  It also causes a few personal crises, as Anita finds out that weird tabloid rumors in St. Louis are jeopardizing Jean-Claude's position, and local vampires are gunning for Jason because he looks just like his cousin. Unfortunately this is only the start of her problems, since the ancient vampire matriarch Mother of All Darkness is waking up -- or I should say, STILL waking up after several books -- and causing yet more trouble for Anita.
  
  For your information, "Blood Noir" was originally a novella. But while the page-count has expanded to that of a full-length novel, Laurell K. Hamilton fails to expand the story along with it -- it still has a novella-sized plot, which appears to have been cribbed from the wastepaper basket of a hack TV writer. We've got lookalikes, confusion, family drama, and embarrassing headlines. Even the name of Jason's cousin -- Keith Summerland -- sounds lifted from a soap.
  
  And Hamilton is pretty clearly making it up as she goes along, throwing in plot twists and contrived crises whenever the slow-moving plot starts lagging. Unfortunately she doesn't actually deal with the fallout of these twists -- most of them just putter out and never really get dealt with. Presumably Hamilton either got tired of writing and wanted to wrap up the book, or she didn't want to write any dramatic scenes that don't involve lots of orgasms, bodily fluids and Anita.
  
  While there isn't as much plotless sex as in some of Hamilton's other books, sex is still the sole driving force of "Blood Noir." Breakups, personal crises, metaphysical problems and threats are all handled by Anita's sex'n'powers combo -- and even in the sex-free portions of the book, the characters' sex lives are what propel things onward.
  
  And sadly, those people's sex lives are more ludicrously silly than genuinely sexy. Anita has inexplicably become a tabloid celebrity more famous than A-list starlets, and Keith's fiancee is only able to identify Jason by staring at his penis. I wish I had made this up, but I couldn't.
  
  Anita continues to be a standard Mary Sue self-insert -- she's abrasive as a power sander, smart as a cinder block, adored and feared by all around her, and develops a new supernatural power every time she sneezes. Comically enough, her sex life is apparently the stuff of national interest now, despite the fact that she basically doesn't do anything to warrant anyone's interest except collect vampires and werebeasties for her expansive harem.
  
  Thankfully that harem is rarely glimpsed in this book, and it's soon obvious why this is a good thing. The supposedly suave Jean-Claude has become needy and clingy, the appallingly creepy Nathaniel acts like a pimp, and Jason has been transformed into a self-absorbed slut who treats non-Anita women like sex toys. And Hamilton takes yet another pot-shot at Richard, dragging him into the plot just so Anita can remind us why we are supposed to hate him. Doesn't work.
  
  "Blood Noir" is neither noir nor bloody, and the thin plot is stretched to the breaking point with lots of bad sex, whining, and plot twists that stupefy rather than shock. Truly ghastly -- and not the good way either.
  
  

• Absolutely Dreadful

  
  By A8CCGENCQSSX7 on 2008-05-27
  I'm only 13 chapters into it thus far, but this is probably one of the worst things I've read in a long time. I'm actually pretty tempted to return it without finishing and I've *never* done that before.
  
  The first four chapters are nothing more than an extremely poorly written sex scene between Jason, Nathaniel and Anita - sentence structure is lousy, the sex is boring and I think it's becoming increasingly clear that LKH really knows nothing about the BDSM scene. At one point, Anita actually says her safe word...and Nathaniel *ignores* it. And that's ok?? It's not even close to 'ok'. It's dangerous and it's stupid. I'm not even a follower of the BDSM lifestyle, but even I know that much.
  
  I can't buy the premise very well either. Jason's dad is sick and dying of cancer...ok. He needs to bring a girfriend home to prove he's not gay? Uh...ok. He looks *just* like his complete asshat of a cousin to the point that the media won't leave him alone and no one believes he's not his cousin? Not so much.
  
  The dialogue is also pretty lousy. Jason's lines make him out to be a begging puppy, at least as far as Anita is concerned. It's embarrassing and not much of a turn on. I also find it odd that as soon as it's decided that Jason's going to take Anita home with him, all the other men start getting bitchy. "Wait...I've never met *your* family." *sob* "I'm 400 years old, my family is dead...I've never even brought them up in the last 15 books, but oh! You'll never get to meet them now...blah blah tragic fishcakes..."
  
  Pet peeves: LKH has a tendency to overuse certain words and phrases quite a bit in her books. Thus far it's the word "breathy". *shudders*
  
  *ahem*
  
  That's all I have so far...when I finish, I'm sure I'll come back and add something. Strangely ironic that the cover has a pair of scissors on it...'cause that's probably what you'll want to take to this book when you read it. (Or your eyesockets, whichever is handier)
  
  

• Crap!

  
  By ASY5SEMNWXKBC on 2008-05-27
  I got my hands on an advance copy from a friend. All I can say is this: What the hell has Laura K. Hamilton done to this series? I have been an Anita Blake fan for years now. I own the entire series. I enjoyed the Strong Independent Female character. What she has become in the last several books is a travesty. I'm not a prude and sex is great-but it has it's place. I don't get off on repeated, meaningless, badly construed orgies with EVERY Tom, Dick and Harry. It's become tiring and lethargic to read this crap and I think this is where the series ends for me. Hamilton should take a lesson from the Sookie Stackhouse novels, that have actually gotten better with each book and feature a lead who sleeps with ONE guy at a time. Like most of us who don't charge for it. Let's hope she doesn't screw up the Merry Gentry series too.
  
  

• TOO THROUGH!!

  
  By A1M6BD1YN4N06I on 2008-05-27
  I did not purchase this book. I got it from the library. Having said that, I am glad that I did not purchase this book.
  
  I read it cover to very short 340 pages worth of cover. Happy not to have paid for such a small amount of material and there was nothing new. No new advancement of plot. And I'm sure there are people out there who will say the minute bits of scenes with the Mother of All Darkness did advance the plot, but nope not really.
  
  And one more Richard sappy, whiny moment! I mean did we not go through this in Cerulean Sins, Incubus Dreams, Danse Macabe, the Harlequin. Yup, go back and read and you will see that indeed it is feeling like Groundhog's Day where the Richard moments are concerned. I mean I'm fine with the ardeur. Gain ever evolving powers, but do you ever do anything with them but chase imaginary creatures away in your head and body? How many times must she pass a new beast on to another person? Read & done. YAWN!
  
  Does Anita even work anymore? Is the business still even open? Micah works more than she does. He's always away on coalition business.
  
  A little zombie raising & mystery solving goes a long way and this way nothing of the sort comes.
  
  Take a long rest Laurell. Noone needs this sorry excuse of a novel every year. I don't know if your publishers put that in your contract, but dang it go on strike until you can get some of your mojo back. Solve some crimes, find some mysteries. Anything but what you have been doing will be great!
  
  

• She does it again....

  
  By A3GK6UIX656BJF on 2008-05-28
  **NOTE** THIS CONTAINS SPOILERS
  
  First things first.....
  
  To anyone who bashes those who feel that Laurell K Hamilton ahs sold out from writing a strong, femmale lead and turned the stories into B level porn, grow up. If you continue to be a fan of the series, good for you, but save the drama for your mam or better yet save it for Ms. LKH because her books are sadly lacking it and have been since Obsidian Butterfly.
  
  I will say I still read the series and will likely continue to because its like a train wreck or better yet, like reality TV; you want to look away because its just horrific, but you can't seem to roll down your eyelids and scream ENOUGH!
  
  I started this series years ago and loved each and every one up untill Obsidian Butterfly and then...all heck broke loose.
  
  As a fellow writer I understand the selling out-hey, her new "writing style" attracted a following that helped make her big enough to gain a riduclously long book deal with the AB series and then another spinoff with the graphic novel series for AB. Money talks and I GET THAT. No issues there, but what irritates the kool-aid out of me is when she and her cronies claim "its for the growth of the character." BS. Yes Anita B has done soem growing but the strong , ruthless woman she was gets lots in the sex and LKH I fel, has been turning her into a pseudo super hero as of late with ehr gaining powers like a Master Vamp and making it so eventually, nothing she comes up against will be bigger r badder than she is. One of the early Anita's charms was that she knew all too well she was human and the limitations that imposed so she worked at being tough. Now its just natural and a bit false.
  
  But thats my rant. lets get onto the book shall we?
  
  It was bad. Plain and simple. After her last book "The Harlequin," i had hopes for this one but unfortunately it fell flat. I loved that Jason had a starring role because I have always liked him, but too much just seemed a stretch in this book, like LKH was running out of ideas. That might be why the book was so much charter than Incubus Dreams and some of her mroe recent books.
  
  The whole "mistaken identity" aspect seemed a bit trite even when it was explained in a "DOH so THATS IT!" moment at the end. Extremely contrived and just a way to se up the events that needed a basis to fly off of.
  
  Werewolf stripper Jason drops by Anita's house to whine that his estranged dad is dying, and he's broken up with his girlfriend because she wanted monogamy. Instead of a well written scene comforting while clothes, this opens the book with a three-way. Now yes I know that LKH LOVES to sex it up lately so that didnt bug me but it did in the sense that it seemed a little forced and Nathaniel suddenly being dominant..just seemed off base especially since in the last books he still wasn't a top. But cest la vie.
  
  Anita comforts jason andagrees to pose as his girlfriend so he can prove to his dad that he isn't gay. But when they arrive, Anita finds that Jason is one of several look-alike men in his hometown (cue the contrived mistaken identity thing again), and one of them is his wealthy engaged cousin whom he "always got mistaken for" and who he is mistaken for again, landing hima nd Anita in the middle of a Vamp turf war because said cousin is banging the Master Vamp's wife.
  
  It also causes a few mini crises, as Anita finds out that weird tabloid rumors in St. Louis are jeopardizing Jean-Claude's position. (hence making her and Jason realize they must be "punished" to secure Jean Claude's standing. Eventually its agreed upon they all 'come out of the closet" so Jean Claude just looks like a bisexual Machevellian to the "Council" rather than a straight chump who cannot control his. Apparently if he shares Anita's men, then she is not really running around on him.... Cue ground work for MORE sex and three ways in the next book. At least we will see more of Asher and he is always a delicious hot mess.) Meanwhile local vampires are gunning for Jason because he looks just like his cousin.
  
  Marmee Noir also makes a reappearence, dragging the weretigers into the mix which i did find an interesting twist and I HOPE that LKH takes that opportunity to build a STORY rather than just another partner in AB's bed.
  
  Maybe LKH just needs a break. She's so close to making this a 20 book series and most never make it that long for a reaso; you start over-complicating simple plots and oversimplifying plausibly complicatesd ones.
  
  Richard shows up to be the whiney boy we have all come to love to hate and lo and behold, HE gains a new power, cries about it and then leaves muttering as the violins play, about what a monster he is.
  
  Jean Clause played a cameo. He seemed to be growing back the backbone AB ripped out and I hope he becoems the devilish Machevillian manipulator once more. He was thw ultimate bad boy and this new monk status of his is just a no go, especially when you see how ruthless the other Masters they've coem into contact with lately, are.
  
  Anita didn't do it for me in this till the end when she showed more of the old Anita in how efficiently she handled a mess and saved the day. But the "I'm so torn-because-I-don't-know-if-I-just-want-to-bone-him-or-fall-in-love-with-him" dialogue is OLD. I udnerstood it for Jean Claude, then Micah then Nathaniel but now Jason too?
  
  Essentially the whole book was summed up with: "Jason and I would never be one another's one and oonly but we might always be each other's once in awhile."
  
  It took 336 pages for AB to come up with the same conclusion Jason voiced early on in the book "they're friends with benefits." Subsequently, he is the only character I liked in the book because he remained true to himself-he grew up a little but remained Jason in essence.
  
  At this point it seems LKH ismaking it up as she goes along, throwing in plot twists and contrived crises whenever the book lags (and it DOES lag)but most of those twists don't get handled. They just fade aay like the Master of the Vampire crisis with Jason's cousin Keith. He just "mysteriously died."
  
  I WILL admit there isn't much sex in this book-just that first opening scene, then AB and Jason and later an orgy none of them remember so its not described to us in 4chapters (THANK GOD!) BUT with that said...Breakups, personal crises, metaphysical problems and threats are all handled by Anita having sex with somebody-when of course her sex life isn't nationally covered.
  
  All in all the title was great, but the book sux. As said earlier, I will continue to read her books, either by getting them through the library or buying them and then RETURNING them for the ultimate fakeout. Call it my silent rebellion.
  
  All I can say is
  
  Anita Blake...where ARE YOU?!!!!
  "
  
  
• Blah Blah Blah
  By A25B6BRQM4HKEC on 2008-05-28
  Well I loved these books, even when the sex started getting steamier. They are ok now, biggest complaint is lack of mystery. This one takes the cake in that department. There were so many chances to make this an interesting book, from the mystery surrounding the Summerlands, to the resolution at the end with the mysterious vampire and wife duo. But practically none of it was on screen. It was all "Oh well- that was taken care of" in vague terms, leaving just one 'action' (non sex type) scene in the entire book. I finished with the Meh? feeling that I really dislike from a book. The feeling that says, where was the character development? Where was the plot advancement? What was the mystery? Was there a mystery? What powers did she use/acquire?
  
  Basically, the answer is meh.
  
  
  
  
• Taking a Girlfriend Home to Meet the Family
  By A1I2O9Y3X3HXLS on 2008-07-12
  Blood Noir (2008) is the sixteenth fantasy novel in the Anita Blake series, following The Harlequin. In the previous volume, the Harlequin team exceeded their orders and tried to take over the domain. They underestimated Anita and lost the battle and their lives.
  
  Richard and his self-doubts became a liability during the metaphysical battle and he was told to get in or get out. He chose to withdraw from the triumvirate and this time Anita didn't feel any regrets. Maybe this time their breakup will be forever.
  
  Both Belle Morte -- head of Jean-Claude's bloodline -- and Marmee Noir -- Mother of All Darkness and queen of the vampires -- manifested for a short time through Anita. They were helpful in the battle, but were eventually repelled. Marmee Noir was definitely beginning to wake.
  
  In this novel, Anita came home to find Nathaniel and Jason Schuyler sitting at her kitchen table. Jason -- Nathaniel's best friend -- has a problem. He has just found out that his father is dying and wants to see him and his girlfriend. But Jason has recently broke up with Perdy and lacks a girlfriend at this time.
  
  Jason's father has always been disappointed with his only son and is firmly convinced that he is gay. Jason is definitely heterosexual, but might be bisexual. Of course, his father would consider that the same as homosexual.
  
  Nathaniel suggests that Anita go with Jason as his girlfriend. She has reservations, but finally agrees to do so. Jason is also her friend and ardeur partner, but she is not really his girlfriend in the way that his father would accept. So she wants to help him out in this situation, yet feels a little uncertain about the implicit lies.
  
  Jean-Claude is also a little leery about the circumstances, but still gives his permission. Then Anita learns that she will have to fly to Jason's home in a small prop plane. She definitely doesn't want to do that, but Jean-Claude lets them use his personal jet. Even then, Anita feels uncomfortable, but she is going to follow through with this commitment despite her fears.
  
  In this story, Jason and Anita reach Asheville, North Carolina, without any problems, but they find that the town has been invaded by the media. Keith Summerland -- son of a presidential candidate -- is scheduled to marry Lisa Bromwell in Asheville within the next few days. Unfortunately, most people mistake Jason for the Summerland twins and vice-versa. This is a longstanding problem, but the timing is terrible. Then they find out that the Summerland party is staying at the same hotel as they are.
  
  Jason and Anita get into the hotel through the parking garage within a limo with dark glass windows. Despite the security in the garage, a photographer still gets a picture of Jason. So Jason gives Anita a very theatrical kiss for the camera. The photo man gets away from security while taking even more pictures guaranteed to upset Governor Summerland.
  
  Later, Jason and Anita try to get to the hospital in a taxi, but the media has a feeding frenzy and blocks the driveway. Jason gets out and tells them that he is not Keith Summerland. Then Anita introduces herself to the crowd and a reporter recognizes her relationship with Jean-Claude. Suddenly the reporters fabricate a story about Anita spurning the sexy vampire master of Saint Louis and marrying Jason. While the media are having a creative frenzy, Jason and Anita walk back to the hotel.
  
  When they finally get to the hospital (in a dark glass limo with a police escort), Jason's father is very sarcastic and disparaging. Anita retaliates and chews the father up one side and down the other. She tells him a few unwelcome truths. Suddenly, the old man decides that she is all right. Maybe he is really is a bully like his family believes.
  
  One of the things about Asheville that bugs Anita is that many of the people look alike. She is told that Jerediah Summerland had led a cult into the area to get away from worldly temptations. Jerediah was very self-righteous, but believed in spreading his seed. Later Anita meets the bridesmaids -- all former girlfriends of Jason -- and they all have the same Summerland look.
  
  This tale gets even more complicated when men pursuing Keith catch Jason and Anita instead. Then weretigers and vampires become involved. Anita discovers a new power, but Marmee Noir also reveals a previously unknown ability. Anita loses some memories for a while, but finally recovers them.
  
  This novel contains more sex than recent works, but mostly with Jason only. He certainly appreciates her undivided attention. One of his problems with Perdy was her prudery, but this is not a problem with Anita.
  
  Once again, Anita gets into a very difficult situation because people are withholding information from her. So she finds the truth in her own way. Enjoy!
  
  Highly recommended for Hamilton fans and for anyone else who enjoys tales of sexual antics, preternatural affairs, and various forms of love.
  
  -Arthur W. Jordin
  
  
• Don't waste your time
  By A1LIJ1RJPYXMUY on 2008-05-29
  I generally loved Hamilton's first 6 books or so in the Anita Blake series. Obsidian Butterfly is one of my all time favorite books, period. But don't waste your time on this one (Blood Noir) if you're looking for a serious book. The first 280 pages are all fluff and filler and long, drawn out angst. The actual story only happens in the last 20 pages or so. Buy it as a used paperback in a year if you really want to read this one.
  
  
• Bloody bored to death
  By A11LG21L88WB9L on 2008-06-04
  I haven't bought one of her books since Obsidian Butterfly but I keep checking them out from the library hoping........
  
  Forget it. LKH just can't write a decent Anita Blake book anymore. Makes me wonder if she really wrote the first ones. How can a person's writing change this much? How can the person who wrote the first ten books write the drek that is Blood Noir? She breaks the cardinal rule of writing: Show, don't tell. There is no showing, there is just talk and talk and talk and then guess what? More talk. I couldn't even get worked up about the uninteresting sex, I was too bored to care. I didin't care about Jason's look-a-like cousin or any part of that plot. When finally something interesting happened and The Big Bad takes them over the scene quickly fades to black and LHK TELLS us what happened. She was supposed to SHOW us what happened, instead everyone wakes up two days later and Richard comes riding in to explain what happened. Yak, yak, yak, I was bored to tears by the whole book.
  
  And the absolute worst thing is? I used to go back and reread the early novels with great enjoyment. Now I am so disgusted by LKH, her overexposed personal life, and her horrible writing that it has ruined my enjoyment of the early books I used to love. I can't stop thinking about the real Laurell and all the stupid things that come out of her mouth. I've learned a valuable lesson. When an author has a mid-life crises and marries a boychild, thereby thinking she is the first person to discover sex, you can be given way too much information. The bizarro personality of Laurell herself has eclipsed Anita Blake. Her career path is truly the weirdest thing I have ever seen.
  
  I keep wondering when she will ruin the Merry series. Soon, I imagine. This is worse than when Anne Rice completely lost touch with her early talent. LKH keeps churning them out, each one worse than the last. I can't believe they get printed. If she had started with these books she never would have gotten published. How long can she ride the coattails of that first dozen or so books?
  
  
• Wish there was a negative star......
  By AVRMKADU9H0Y2 on 2008-05-31
  I am done with this author and the Anita Blake series. I'm not sure if LKH just doesn't care anymore, churning out the books for the money, or if she has just lost the ability to write. If it's the former, she should be ashamed, the latter she should kill off the series.
  
  If you want to read a series that is wonderfully written, go buy Jim Butcher's Harry Dresden books, or any of the Charlaine Harris series.
  
  I will never waste another penny on anything LKH puts to paper.
  
  
  
• Dull Noir
  By A1T17LMQABMBN5 on 2008-06-02
  Anita Blake, federal marshal and vampire executioner, does a big favor for her friend and lover Jason -- she will pose as his girlfriend to visit his family. His father, who abused him as a child and has always thought he was homosexual, is dying of cancer, and Jason wants to take this opportunity not only to say goodbye to the old man but to hopefully let bygones be bygones. Anita isn't sure about accepting, but Nathaniel convinces her to do so. It should be easy enough, and it means that Anita will get to put away her Browning because this trip won't involve any sort of preternatural drama or danger, right? Wrong. First of all, Anita never leaves her house unarmed. Second of all, disaster strikes as soon as she and Jason arrive in Asheville. Jason looks a lot like Keith Summerson, the governor's son, a local celebrity known for his womanizing and scandalous endeavors. Jason looks so much like him that he had been confused for Keith. Keith is engaged to be married, so imagine the scandal when "Keith" shows up with a woman who is clearly not his fiancée. Keith's father is planning to run for president, so a scandal is out of the question. But that is the least of their problems. The press learns that Jason is the werewolf stripper from Guilty Pleasures, and Jean-Claude's pomme de sang. Rumors begin that Anita has dumped the vampire Master of the City for Jason, something that could make Jean-Claude seem like a weakling to other Masters of the City. And then the worst happens. Marmee Noir has chosen this moment to rear her ugly head. It appears that Anita needs her Browning after all.
  
  Blood Noir was very boring for me. It was a chore to read. During the first half of the book, you get all the stuff with the press and Jason's family, some of which is interesting, but sorely lacking in action. What you get for the most part is dialogue -- endless dialogue about family problems and Jason wanting to be closer to Anita. In other words, you get the same ol', same ol'. I like some balance between telling and showing, and too much showing with little narrative can be just as jarring as the other way around. Sometimes it felt as though I was reading a film script. As for the Jason-themed installment, perhaps this character development would have been appreciated eight or so books ago, but now it is too little, too late. All we get from that is that Jason is now included in the long string of weak, clingy and whiny men in Anita's circle. "Why don't you love me the way you love Micah and Nathaniel?" Or words to that effect. Blech! The old Jason would have never stooped so low. And of course, he has a dysfunctional family and yet another victim of abuse. Fancy that. There are fewer sex scenes here, thank goodness. You get the very first sex scene (a rather dull threesome between Jason, Anita and Nathaniel) in chapter two and ends in chapter four. (It may sound like a lot, but most of the chapters are about three to five pages long.) Again, it's not that I don't enjoy sex in my reading. I do, but the sex here is so friggin' clinical! I mean, Anita, Nathaniel and Jason (who breaks up with Perdy) discuss where they want to do it, for crying out loud! And the commentary! It reminded me of a visit to the doctor. "Now I will take your blood pressure," and "Now I need a urine sample," only in sex talk. Eew! But why am I surprised? I've had this problem since Hamilton decided to write "erotica." (Hamilton does manage to come out with some cool and original titles for her books. I must congratulate her on that. If only the stories lived up to their titles...)
  
  Another thing that leaves me scratching my head is Anita constantly blushing at something Jason says. When did she become such a big blusher? For a second I thought I was reading a romance novel. And I can't believe she still feels "uncomfortable" about the ardeur and her sexuality. When are we going to move on from that? Also, what happened to some of the newer, interesting characters like Wicked and Truth? Have they been written off or something? Anyway, I do like the fact that Anita seems to be more open to letting Jean-Claude and the others be with others and feels bad about undermining his authority in front of the other vampires. (Then again, JC is supposed to be this badass, dangerous vampire, or at least he once was!) Jean-Claude's openness, however, is seen as "revolutionary," which brings some story ideas for future installments. But I don't think I'll be around to read them. The Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter novels are no longer what they once were, simple as that. I thought a novel centered on Jason, one of my favorite characters, would be interesting, but unfortunately it is not. I think this will be my last Anita Blake book. They may get better or they may not, but I cannot muster the hope or interest to care either way.
  
  
• If only I could give this "0 Stars"
  By A35TFES6XXN8DE on 2008-06-03
  This book is terrible. I mean, truly terrible. It's unoriginal at best, a waste of paper at its most truthful. I may have some spoilers in here, so be warned.
  
  In this particular offering, Anita's "friend" Jason needs her to pose as his girlfriend to visit his dying father so that his "ultra-conservative, white-bread" family won't continue to think that Jason is gay. Jason gets kidnapped due to a sadly predictable plot twist and big bad Anita saves the day. If it sounds like a poorly written soap opera, it gets worse. I won't spoil it for you. In sum, "Noire" is more of the same drivel I've come to expect from Hamilton. Yes, there is less sex. Not much less, though, and the sex hasn't been replaced with plot. Scenes are stretched to their breaking point and beyond, pointless conversations abound, and the sex is thrown in when there is a lull in plot progression. There is very little action. I've been told that this novel was a novella first, and that does explain some of its problems, but certainly not all. This book has the same problems that all but the first 4 Anita books have. Characters are unbelievable, unorginal, and for the most part, 2 dimentional. Anita herself utterly destroys any suspension of disbelief that Hamilton can muster. Anita is a pure example of "Mary Sue-ism" or "Snappy Sue-ism". For an explaination of what I mean, go to http://www.kitwhitfield.com/2006/09/mary-sue-gets-mean.html and http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mary_Sue . Anyone who has read any of Hamilton's books will find these articles to ring sadly true for Anita. Anita is a necromancer, a vampire slayer, a Federal marshall, a Lupa, a Bolverk, a living succubus with her own animal(s) to call and a "triumverate" (a stupid, stupid word) of power, a human servant, a Nimir-raj, and in "Noire", she adds little queen of the were-tigers to the already downright silly list. She is also in a polyamorous relationship with multiple men who are not allowed to be with anyone but her, has sex with them all day long, and still can walk upright enough to do all the occupations listed. Any attractive man that Anita comes across wants, needs, falls madly in love with her and becomes her slave, and all women envy her. Most of the men are strippers. Though each of Anita's men is a supernatural (and very well-endowed) powerhouse, Anita is stronger than all of them combined, and must protect them like a nest of newborn bunnies from all the big bad that inexplicably surrounds Anita. Personal fantasy much? You be the judge.
  
  There is little plot to be had in the Anita Blake series, and what plot there is has been ripped from the pages of other books or White Wolf and Dungeons and Dragons games. The majority of the book is taken up by poorly written sex and useless dialog about sex and/or how wonderful/powerful Anita is. Hamilton once wrote a response to her critics, in which she says that one shouldn't read her books if they didn't want to think, or if they wanted comfort, or didn't want to push the envelope. I find this to be a ridiculous expression of Hamilton's overblown ego. Never have I found the Anita Blake novels thought provoking in any way. (Other than the obvious "Why did I buy this" question I pose to myself over and over) These books are at best fluff. Mindless entertainment.
  
  Anne Rice's earlier vampire novels made me think. They caused me to feel something, to question myself and my beliefs about good and evil. Anne Rice's vampire novels also pushed the envelope. Her "Interview with the Vampire" was the first book to show vampires as more (and less) than monsters, as feeling, thinking beings. Hamilton tries far too hard to push the evelope. She does so by throwing in kinky sex (also done by Anne Rice and Poppy Z. Brite, a very good if not well known horror writer), a poorly researched and horribly depicted version of BDSM (which was also done, and I think, very well by Anne Rice in her "Sleeping Beauty" series), and hints at homosexuality. (Again done first by Anne Rice and then to death by other writers). Though she hints at or throws these things into the mix, none of them are done believably or well. Most of her male leads are gay or bisexual, but all of them want Anita and they are never allowed to have sexual contact with one another, as per Anita's rule. Hamilton rails against monogamy in the novels, but only for Anita. All of her lovers must be monogamous with her, or be refused in bed. This even applies to Jean-Claude, her "master" an incubus who uses sex to feed and from whom Anita got her own "ardure". It rings more than fake, it is utterly ridiculous and cruel. It is hinted at in "Noire" that Anita may deign to allow two of her men to make love, but I will be truly suprized if this happens, or if it does, if it gets more than a paragraph. Hamilton's BDSM is a horror. The BDSM scenes are silly, over the top, or in the case of "Noire", very vanilla and boring.It is written from the view of a vanilla, Mid-Western, suppressed mindset. For all of Hamilton's constant lectures on how open-minded and left-wing she is, the way she writes causes me to believe the exact opposite. In the series, anyone who likes BDSM was abused as a child and either likes to be horribly injured or completely dominated in every aspect of their lives. There is no safe word, no trust, no love. There is only Anita doing whatever she wants to whomever she wants, whenever she wants to do it.
  
  The BDSM reads more like an excuse for characters to allow Anita to walk all over them than a believable plot device. Just like the "ardure" is an excuse for Anita to have non consensual sex with everyone and anyone. If the genders were reversed, and Anita was a man with a harem of women, how well received would these books be? Why is rape ok when it happens to men? Of course, in the novels, none of the men mind afterwards because they fall predictibly and unbelievably in love with Anita. I find the books to be one giant comfortfest for Anita, and for the writer. Anita's ego is constantly stroked and enlarged by all other characters. If for any reason a character does not believe that the sun does not rise and set on Anita's command, he or she is belittled, reviled, or done away with. All of the male characters (with the exception of Nathaniel) are "powerful men", yet they constantly need Anita to save them. Jean-Claude and Richard got kidnapped, Richard's family got kidnapped, Micah was being treatened, Nathaniel was kidnapped and in "Noire", yet another "strong" man will be kidnapped. Who saves them all? Anita. Believable? No. Comforting and ego enlarging? Yes. Jean-Claude and Richard become more and more whiny, needy, and dependent upon Anita as the books progress, leading me to believe that the author mocking them up to be strong men was for the sole benefit of making Anita look even stronger when she breaks them to her will. There are also very few female characters in the novels so that Anita has no competition. Those that are there are either weaklings whom Anita must kick around and protect,they are jealous bitches who hate Anita because all the men love her so, or they are lesbians who want to have sex with Anita.
  
  Anita seems to be heavily based on Hamilton herself, and the whole series reads like a lonely woman's slightly dark sex fantasy. Almost everything in Anita's background was taken directly from Hamilton's life. I'm not saying that it's wrong for an author to do that, but it ceases to be fiction at some point.
  
  I haven't even bothered to go over all of the inconsistencies in plot, character description, or spelling errors left in Hamilton's finished works. She seriously needs to proof-read and remember what she's written before. If Hamilton can't remember what has happened in previous books, how can she expect the rest of us to? Or to even bother?
  
  I know that most of Hamilton's oldest fans (myself included) want "the old Anita" back. This isn't going to happen. Ever. Hamilton has discovered that she can write an entire book about nothing but sex and how wonderful her main character is and make millions. Why would she ever go back? Research is difficult and time consuming. Plots take time, thought, and orginality to come up with. Why not just jot down her own fantasies and cash in? I really think that the only people who still buy these books are A.teenage Goths and bored housewives who get their jollies off the icky were-monster sex, B. die hard fans, or those who had the books recommended to them by A or B. At this point, my expectations are so low that I wouldn't mind the books if all they were was interesting sex, but Hamilton can't even manage that. Don't buy this book. If you must read it, borrow it from the library or read it in the bookstore. If no one buys this crap, maybe, just maybe Hamilton will understand what she's done to what was a promising series and became less that a Mary-Sued Buffy the Vampire slayer fanfic.
  
  
  
• No longer disappointed - just a sad farewell
  By A1ZN3WCDD532Q0 on 2008-06-19
  I used to say that I was disappointed at the turn of the Anita Blake series, but no longer. Now it's time to say goodbye.
  
  I had hoped that with The Harelquin, the sexual revolution that had overthrown what had been a fantastic character and series was coming to an end. I was mistaken. I've been forcing myself to continue to buy this series, but when it's over, it's over.
  
  This book has no plot, no believable dialogue, nor anything of interest. All of its flaws have been outlined well by other reviewers, so I will only add that I would recommend to readers new to the series to begin with book one and end at book eight.
  
  Originally, Anita was a powerhouse character. She had standards and aquired power as the books progressed. I very much enjoyed the developing coldness of Anita, particularly her pragmatic decision to torture someone to get information about Richard's kidnapped family.
  
  Anita still defines herself as a vampire executioner and necromancer. When was the last time she actually executed a vampire? Killing them with "love" doesn't count. What happened to the blood and guts of this series? As for being a necromancer, I couldn't point to the last book in which she raised the dead. Isn't that supposed to be how she earns a living? Did she win the lottery somewhere in the series and I missed it? Every now and then she says something about "my job" or "my boss" and it throws me every time.
  
  Perhaps Ms. Hamilton should consult a necromancer herself in an effort to resurrect her skill as a coherent and exciting story teller.
  
  Ultimately the responsibility for the incredible decline of this series - and of the author's writing - rests solely with the editor and publishing house. When they saw what was happening with the series, they should have suggested - no insisted - that Ms. Hamilton start a new series to explore her sexuality, and let Anita alone. Or end the Anita series entirely.
  
  The only ones to blame that this series continues to be published is us, the fans of the original Anita Blake. If we stopped spending money on these "books," the publisher would stop printing them. It's about the numbers, people, and I for one am not going to be counted for this author anymore.
  
  
• This is the WORST book in the series
  By A2SCVVASKS515Y on 2008-05-28
  So far, this is the WORST book in the acclaimed Anita Blake series. There is no plot, no intrigue, no mystery, no paranormal romance, etc. Unfortunately, the series had taken the 180 degree turn to the worst, and it's getting more and more boring with each new book.
  
  
• Potential Lost
  By APZVBVVSOEARS on 2008-05-28
  I have just finished Blood Noir and others have hit the perverbial nail on the head. It basicly all takes place in a hotel room, more sex with strange wereanimals and Richard pops up to whine and complain. It was sooo boring, perdictable and useless. I think she should fire her ghost writer and get back to the real Anita. Include the sex and friends but get a plot will ya!
  
  
  
• Au revoir ma petite
  By A1KQL98HVOJTGN on 2008-05-29
  Sigh... I read Lunatic Cafe again the other day, and it made me sad. Sad because I just can't figure out how LKH managed to turn such an amazing heroine and storyline into what are, at best, poorly written romance novels. Frankly, I question whether the early Anita Blake stuff was even written by Hamilton given how stark the thematic and writing quality differences are between then and now. Suffice to say, I am done. Blood Noir will be the last $18 the Hamilton franchise gets from me.
  
  
• Come on!
  By A1LR4Z5Z0MPYIF on 2008-05-29
  Who wrote this vomit? That's really all I can say. One of two things has happened here: either Hamilton never wrote the earlier works, or she's not writing them now. I mean, come on! Forget the sex, forget the poor spelling and grammar, or the character assassinations...this was just horrible writing! Boring and nothing that expands on the overall plot. People, wake up, we're having our pockets picked. She just doesn't care about her work anymore, this book proves it. Never again, Hamilton, never again. AND I returned this one to the bookstore! Waste of money.
  
  
• from a sci-fi/mystery/suspense series to romantic suspense
  By A3MRGCD10AITQ2 on 2008-05-28
  I just picked up my copy last night at Borders and finished it last night. The book in itself is very short. Anita's personality is changing, and not in a direction that I like. Surrounding herself with all of these needy and dysfunctional people is starting to rub off on her. When the heck is Anita going to go back out in the field? The series has turned from a sci-fi/ mystery/ suspense series to romantic suspense. There is no depth any more. When is there going to be another Obsidian Butterfly? Pretty much all of the books after that novel have been down hill. Anita's character is full of rage and all we see is "la di da... Anita is frolicking in a field with the men she loves, skipping about" with the occasional killing of the bad guy within the last 50 pages of the book.
  
  What I want to know is, what Hamilton has to say for herself. I've gone to her websites and all of the criticisms from her fans, she ignores. We invited Anita into our lives, have followed her through good times and bad; Cried when she's cried, raged when she's raged... and this is what you give us. It's like Hamilton thinks her fans love Anita's character so much that they will continue to take the morsels she is offering and then say she has given us a full meal. After finishing the first books in the series, I was satisfied. There were things left to question, but it didn't make the story incomplete and let you anticipating the next book. There has been no satiation in Hamilton's recent books. I wonder if she'll finally listen to the majority of her fans and examine what she is doing with Anita.
  
  
  
• For the love of god, please stop!
  By A1TTLHXGZUZXSY on 2008-06-03
  I promised myself I wouldn't suffer through another vacuous Laurell Hamilton entry to the Anita Blake saga. Yet I did it again. I will err no more. What was once a fabulous series has deteriorated to tedious and insipid sex scenes which attempt to mask lack of plot and increasingly impoverished writing skills. It makes me sad to read something so boring and tacky when the series used to be wonderful and imaginative.
  
  
• So sad..
  By A3CITJE9R4X53O on 2008-05-30
  While the Meredith Genrty series has been the stepchild from this author there are too many similarities now in basic writing to ignore.
  
  This book should be called "Anita Goes Away for the Weekend" and posted on the blog than making her fans pay another HARDCOVER price for novella content.
  
  The plot moves nowhere, again! Even though there were so many opportunities to delve deeper! I.E. Las Vegas, Charlston, the Presidential Race, etc...
  
  The last Meridenth Gentry book was nearly the EXACT same weekend!
  
  I was mad the 1st time I paid for this dribble! Now I have done it twice. I am done with this author until we get some actual writing and plot/character development.
  
  
  
  
• Nothing left to enjoy
  By A3FEXWCM5COPOL on 2008-05-30
  I have been a fan of these books for so long its not funny. I've read the entire series over a dozen times at least. Only CS Lewis got that kind of loyalty from me.
  
  And unlike some who stopped enjoying these books many books ago, I have remained a fan. But this time I'm done. There was no plot (but I had gotten use to that), no progression of story line, half the book the others have been, no action, the exact same character dialog from every other book, and this time the sex was lame.
  
  This time we didnt get Quality or Quantity.
  
  
• This. Ends. Now.
  By A2RNZLDRMBE4M9 on 2008-06-05
  I feel like I've been in an abusive relationship. I only discovered this series late last year and was so happy in the beginning. I loved books 1-6. Those were really good times. 7,8 were ok, 9 was brilliant. Then came the drugs - the ardeur - and everything went downhill. But I kept hoping, waiting for things to turn around... and it wasn't so bad at first. But then... Incubus Dreams... and the horror of Micah, which I foolishly thought was an actual book. Imagine my rage at reading Micah after just finishing Incubus Dream. That was a low point. I still thought things could change though. I had stupidly bought all the books at once anyway. And The Harlequin wasn't really so soo bad...
  
  But now after trudging thru Blood Noir I finally see that I don't have to do this. I don't have to put up with this anymore. I deserve better. There is better out there. Listen to me people! You can be free too! No more repetitive phrases, no more pointless sex, no more ardeur as salvation, no more mindless worshipping of Anita by everyone. No more.
  
  Come with me.
  
  
• Possibly one of the worst books I've ever read
  By A1VL96UX4X3UVI on 2008-06-29
  Laurell K. Hamilton's "Anita Blake" series has managed to become so epically bad, if any books were to inhabit the top 5 worst books I've ever read, they would all belong to this series. It's a pity that a series I once respected and enjoyed has become a form of literary hell, the kind that inflicts mental anguish upon its readers. Blood Noir (Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter, Book 16) is no exception, and only further exhibits this series' fall from grace.
  
  Plot wise, "Blood Noir" is sorely lacking. It's almost as if Hamilton wanted so badly to write another novel in this series that she came up with the lamest plot attempt possible as a justification for writing it. I knew my brain was doomed the moment I read the first chapter and the important and startling revelation was that Jason had been forced by his girlfriend to only have sex in a bed with--gasp!--only missionary positions. But this could not stretch the plot any further than the 4 chapter long sex scene that would ensue, so it was further revealed that Jason's dad has cancer and is dying. Way to go, Laurell. I don't think I've ever seen a terminal illness treated as secondary to a controlling girlfriend. Anita, for idiotic reasons that don't make much sense, is asked to accompany Jason to visit his dad so that he might have a last Hallmark moment with a parent who has treated him like crap his whole life. And thus begins "Blood Noir", quite possibly one of the worst books I've ever read.
  
  The plot (rather, what could only jokingly be described as a plot) continues with Jason being constantly mistaken for the governor's son Keith, Mommy Noir interrupting for some darkity dark stupid attack on the twosome (I must be mistaken to assume this vampire is a villain. It's the only excuse I can come up with to explain why on earth she would induce a two day sex session as a method of attack), Anita unsurprisingly gets more super powers, and Richard comes back for more arguing. Wow, the summaries of the latest books are all starting to sound astonishingly similar.
  
  Blood Noir, besides having a weak premise, is absolutely agonizing to read. Clearly, there was very minimal editing that went into this book, because the sheer amount of grammar and spelling mistakes were copious. Many of them could have been fixed by simply running spell check on Microsoft Word. Even someone as idiotically technophobic as Laurell K. Hamilton shouldn't find that much difficulty in running a program as easy as spell check, which requires nothing more than pushing a button and paying just enough attention to make sure it doesn't correct certain words not included in the dictionary. Also, the fact that these books are no longer edited for content is becoming painfully clear, as events are rehashed and many scenes/lines/whole plots/entire book? was an unnecessary inclusion for this series. I suspect that if "Blood Noir" were professionally edited at all, a vast majority of the book would be suggested for removal and the end result would probably be no more than 100 pages. "Blood Noir" is nothing more than a pointless self insertion and I'm trying--and failing--to find a reason for why it was even written.
  
  As for the characters and those who may have been anxious to hear that this book featured Jason as a main character, don't fall for it. Laurell K. Hamilton has obviously begun to equate the concept of "character development" with "accumulating a ridiculous amount of powers". If these characters have grown at all mentally, then I don't see it. Possibly, Anita Blake gets stupider as the novels progress. Half the book includes supporting characters being forced to explain what the hell is going on to this so called "preternatural expert". I doubt a more blatant example of a Mary Sue can be found in all of literature and, I dare say, the original Mary Sue would probably be offended by Anita Blake's character. Despite all of her flaws, including the fact that she's an idiot who gets angry at even the slightest provocation (and many times even without provoking), men flock to her and rail on about how amazing she is. And Richard, probably the only man sampling her wonder vagina who actually loves her despite all of her pointless power ups, is regarded as nothing more than a nuisance. And his idea of monogamy and marriage is treated by Anita as an almost disgusting example of idealism. Most of the time I feel like rescuing his character from Anita Blake, who clearly deserves being surrounded by men who love her for no reason other than the influence her powers have on them.
  
  The other half of the novel includes pointless infodumps during dialogue. Hamilton clearly never learned how to share information seamlessly in a novel, because her attempts at summarizing are so forced and unnatural sounding, they resemble the mistakes of a new writer, rather than one who is on the 16th book in a fairly successful series. And then are these emotional moments with Jason that not only fail miserably, they are damn near laughable in their attempts to be serious and heartfelt. The sex scenes are just as bad, and the only good point about "Blood Noir" that I can describe is the fact that Hamilton chose not to describe the mystically inflicted 2 day sexathon with Anita Blake and three men. The worst part, however, appears to be a nod to the series' "negative readers" in the form of confusing and random statements about people (without stating who) being "jealous" of Anita's lifestyle as the town bike of St. Louis. "Jealous" is not how I would describe my mentality upon thinking about Anita's life style. "Flagrantly idiotic", yes. "Shudder worthy", definitely. "Jealous"? Only in this author's bad excuse for a wish fulfillment.
  
  Read "Blood Noir" at your own risk. The days of Anita Blake being a good preternatural series are over. If these latest novels are any indication, Laurell K. Hamilton will probably be considered one of the worst authors in the preternatural genre. I can't help but suspect that the phrase, "Pulling a Laurell K. Hamilton" may start to be used by readers to describe authors in the genre who have jumped the shark. Though I highly doubt any other author could do it with the flair of Laurell K. Hamilton. Despite having a productive writing career for the last decade, Hamilton appears to write worse now than she did some 15 years ago, when the "Anita Blake" series first began. And that is quite the accomplishment.
  
  
• A fan fiction disguised as a real novel
  By A3QWKT59PL3TFP on 2008-06-18
  I am a long time reader of the Anita Blake series, with certainly a strong inclination towards the earlier books. Yet, despite how I may have preferred the style of the older books compared to the last seven or so, I do happen to like some the characters who appear much later in the series.
  
  Blood Noir is the first book of the Anita Blake series where I had to actually put it down in disgust, just from reading the first chapter. I have never, ever had that happen to me before.
  
  The beginning of the book is atrocious. Jason becomes reduced to a character begging for pity sex, with then several pages of Anita inwardly proclaiming that 'they' all are jealous of her, without any explanation of who 'they' are with Mary Sue quality flair. This is soon followed by many pages debating on how and where to have pity sex. Yet, once they actually do the deed it is so monotonous and dull, despite having BDSM elements (which are written poorly) that it lead me to believe the author at least got the pity part done well. I certainly pitied the characters.
  
  Once I did manage to bring myself to read the rest of the book, since Jason used to be (not any more after reading this book) one of my favorite characters, I discovered the rest is truly no better.
  
  Blood Noir is very dialog heavy. A prime example of an author simply telling and not showing various occurrences in the book, which is usually a common mistake made by new writers. Not ones who have already written so many novels.
  
  Characters suddenly appear in scenes sometimes completely out of the blue, typos run amok, and any plot and action not wallowing in clinical descriptions of sex only appears near the very end. Like a tacked on after thought.
  
  Neither is there any continuity from the previous book, The Harlequin. So those who were interested in any kind of continuation or questions answered from the previous story are out of luck. Even those primarily interested in knowing more about Jason(such as myself), will discover that what little is revealed about his past is not anything a person couldn't have figured out on their own. Except for perhaps the odd Twilight Zone feel concerning his hometown apparently full of characters who look a great deal like each other and have trouble telling themselves apart unless they look at each others genitalia. Which while humorous, becomes dreadfully clear it actually wasn't meant to be funny.
  
  I would equate this book with a bad episode from a soap opera, or a fan fiction where all the characterizations are off and the storyline is simple. The cover and title of the book has nothing to do with the actual contents.
  
  
• Well thats a few hours of my life I'll never get back
  By A3MOYAY4MNTFDU on 2008-05-30
  I honestly had hope after the last book that the Anita Blake series was starting to redeem its self....I was dead wrong. I read the book and I could only think "WHATS THE POINT???" Like so many other I mourn the loss of the Anita from the earlier books. My advice to the writer is if you really cant think of better story lines kill the character, let her go out with grace and the dignity that you have taken away from her. The only reason I rated it 1 star is because Amazon wouldnt let me post this without it, frankly they should have a negative system for books as bad as this, this stinker deserves about a negative 8!
  
  
• Sort of entertaining
  By A2NJFDOS9JNRRF on 2008-05-29
  I've read a ton of the Anita Blake series and I agree with others that the story is dissolving. I want to love the book but I just can't...
  
  What bothered me the most was how LITTLE happened in the 300 some pages. I liked the idea of the relationship between Anita and Jason but it just got so BLAH at the end. Plus I'm SO sick of this crap going on between Anita and Richard. It's the same thing every time... "i'm so jealous! why wont you marry me, anita?". This is always followed up by Richard trying to kill Anita "accidentally". The sex was a bit boring and repedative. I was annoyed that only like 3 main characters were involved in the plot and now there are every MORE men who are going to come see her for sex int he next novel! AHHH!!
  
  I had high hopes for this novel. I went and got it the morning it came out and finished it that night. I kept turning the pages hoping for something... anything.... but nothing came.
  
  
• Bring the original Anita back
  By A1Q8KZ5F8F4XWC on 2008-05-30
  I want the old Anita back.
  
  I was completely absorbed by the first book and completely addicted to Hamilton's writing and Anita by the second. Unfortunately after Obsidian Butterfly (the best written of the bunch IMHO), the writing quality stumbled, crashed and has never fully recovered. (I don't know what happened in her personal life but it had to have been major.)
  
  I was so, so, so hoping that after Micah, she'd pulled the series a bit farther out of the nosedive it'd been taking. I am very, very sorry to say I was wrong.
  
  Though some of the sex scenes were good (& above the emotionally disconnected bad porn level), and a few of the interactions with Jason reminded me of their friendship that was evident in previous books, the overall effect was one of drudgery. NOT a good thing.
  
  My recommendation - if you must read this book - either get it from your local library or wait till it comes out in paperback or your local used bookstore.
  
  My recommendation to Hamilton - get a much better editor and a better contract so you can take your time and write a good book again. A contract where you're not forced to write to a deadline for your paycheck, you're not a journalist. Your longtime fans, and I am one, will still be here when you get back.
  
  
• Could this series get any more ridiculous
  By A13YJ7M010L3DO on 2008-06-02
  I was really hoping for some meat in this one. It looked promising, like it was going to have some semblance of a plot, but alas, it was like sitting in a sailboat in the middle of the dead sea with no wind to direct. this story had no direction, and for heaven's sake, lets stop dredging up characters just to abuse them! (read richard) There are so many more characters that are left on the back burner that could help the plot, but LKH is using this space to flog her ex. Give it a rest please! This story could have been better if: my dog had been given a typewriter, AND if he was helped along by 100 monkeys. Stick a fork in me i'm done. No more moola for you, LKH, you'll have to get your money from the true and dense.
  
  
• Such A Disappointment
  By A14SEDGLA8EYJD on 2008-05-30
  In anticipation of the release of this book, I re-read (for the 3rd or 4th time) all of the prior books in the series. I consider myself to be a true fan. I started reading Blood Noir as soon as I got it. Just after the first two chapters I became concerned about the quality of the story but I had such faith in the author that I continued on. After a few more chapters of hoping the tide would turn, I realized I was reading it not for the enjoyment of the book but to just get it over. It was such a disappointment.
  
  
• It flat out DIDN'T do it for me.
  By A2I0KQGNY3K8CJ on 2008-06-26
  I am a newcomer to the Anita-verse. A friend had been urging me to give the series a try for years and I kept blowing her off because it didn't sound like my thing. And then the controversy started. And it blew up to such magnificent proportions complete with full-fledged internet flame wars that I knew I couldn't hold myself back any longer and I picked up the first book in this series: Guilty Pleasures.
  
  That was in the spring of 2007. I hadn't been terribly impressed with Guilty Pleasures, but I gave Hamilton the benefit of the doubt because it was the first book in the series and I had to admit that it had been somewhat entertaining. I was as surprised as anyone to discover that by the third book in the series, Circus of the Damned, I was completely hooked and kept trucking right along with the rest of the series.
  
  Keep in mind that the entire time I was reading the series; I already knew what to expect. I'd read the complaints and fan disappointment about Anita, the ardeur and her hodgepodge harem of vampires and wereanimals, so I knew it was coming and took it all with a serious grain of salt when the fluids began to gush and flow.
  
  For that reason, I think those things that have been such a disappointment to so many other readers seemed somewhat blown out of proportion to me. I'd gone into the deal knowing that Anita would eventually change from a prudish workaholic into a craveaholic sex fiend with a penchant for rough play and dirty, dirty bedroom (bathroom, living room, kitchen) recreation so I wasn't shocked when it happened and I tolerated it.
  
  And then I read the most recent installment, Blood Noir. And seriously? I finally get it.
  
  This was one of the most painful books I've ever read. Thankfully I'd opted to NOT purchase this one and had added my name to the waiting list at the library so I only just finished it last night.
  
  First of all, what in the world was up with the first five chapters of this book?!? I don't have a problem with sex in books. I LIKE sex in books. But this sex did not leave me wanting to go into a room alone somewhere and light a candle. This literally had me squirming in discomfort and gasping in horror. The character's conversations about the sex that was soon-to-be-had occurred too early in the book and without enough of an introduction to put it in an appropriate context. I'm assuming the purpose of having a graphic threesome between Anita, Nathaniel and Jason so early on was to establish a "reasonable" premise for Anita to agree to fly to Asheville to meet Jason's abusive, dying father and the rest of the family. Buuuuut...
  
  It flat out DIDN'T do it for me. Sorry Anita. Sorry Laurel. -5 stars straight off the bat for that filthy hogwash.
  
  As the novel progressed, I calmed down and finally felt like I was easing into the swing of things and while I was slightly annoyed by the look-a-like cousin kafuffle that resulted with Keith Summerland and the lack of any concrete reason that there was anything for Anita and Co. to be truly concerned about, I felt myself thinking, "okay, maybe there are 3 stars in here somewhere, if only Hamilton would just remember her plot and not let the--"
  
  Ok, forget it. Because suddenly the bachelorette party happened and someone flashed their "cookies." And then the 48-hour-long foursome that involved Anita, Jason, a strange stripper and a news reporter happened. And then Marmee Noir hallucinations and Richard (!) randomly showed up. And all of a sudden I was like HOLD UP! There aren't that many pages left in this book and literally nothing has happened except some crazy hotel sexin' that has taken up the entire middle and most of the end of this book!
  
  And then all of a sudden, the poor, underdeveloped plot attempted to take off in what was probably supposed to be an Anita Blake "action sequence" but it was so horribly rushed that it felt like a cop out. And you know what? The "action sequence" and plot resolution took up fewer chapters than the nasty threesome scene from the beginning of the book. Seemingly out of nowhere, we're told (not shown) that Keith Summerland has run off with a Master of the City's wife, another vampire named Lorna. And that because Jason looks so similar to his cousin, the Master's human servant and vampire pawns can't tell the difference and abduct Jason instead of their real target, Keith Summerland. Jason is tortured. Anita saves him. The end.
  
  The moral of the story is that 1) you can color me disappointed but 2) I'm probably not going to stop reading the series. I'll continue to rely on my local library for the goods (so sorry amazon) because I don't want these books on my bookshelf but I feel like I've already invested so much into this that I must see it through right on through to the sloppy end.
  
  

• From Dead to Worse (Southern Vampire Mysteries, Book 8)
• Swallowing Darkness (Meredith Gentry, Book 7)
• The Outlaw Demon Wails (Rachel Morgan, Book 6)
• A Lick of Frost (Meredith Gentry, Book 6)
• Laurell K. Hamilton's Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter: The First Death