Cobra Reviews

• SIMPLY AWFUL

  
  By A319SKSB556033 on 2000-04-25
  This is one of the worst films I have ever seen and that is NO joke. There is No plot. There is some mumbo-jumbo about a serial killer called "The Night Stalker" who wants to create a "New World" and kills many dumb blondes. A rather strange way to go about achieving such ambitions indeed but apparently that wasn't important to the screenwriter. The DVD is a bit of a dud too. The widescreen version isn't really 1.85:1 and the picture quality is terrible. The directors commentary is dire. George Pan Cosmatos is virtually silent throughout the entire film and offers no insight into the making of the film whatsoever. Not that I expected there to be any. All in all this DVD is a HUGE waste of money. Steer clear!
  
  

• Arguably the worst movie ever made!

  
  By on 2000-07-21
  The plot: Renegade cop fights psychopathic killers-- essentially its a blatant rip-off of "Dirty Harry" complete with "Dirty Harry" cast members Reni Santori and Andy Robinson in supporting roles. Unfortunately, "Cobra" doesn't even come close to matching "Dirty Harry" as a film. It's just awful. I could go on and on about its horrific use of every action film cliche in the book. In fact, this film is so over-the-top in its use of action cliches that, at times, one suspects that it was made to be a parody of action films. Yet Stallone's performance quickly puts those thoughts to rest. He plays his character straight without any hint of self depreciation which makes it all the more ridiculous. It's obvious that Stallone was hoping that Marion Cobretti would join his stable of lucrative, sequel producing characters. Luckily for the movie-going public, "Cobra Part II" never materialized after the failure of "Cobra."

  Why is this movie so awful? Too many reasons to be explained in detail; but I'll try to point out some of its worst elements. The amount of advertising in this film has to be seen to be believed. The beginning of the movie takes place in a supermarket for no other reason than to have Cobra stand next to the advertisements of various products. In another scene, our hero turns on a TV which, of course, has to show a full length commercial for Toys-R-Us before moving onto a bogus news story. The ending was stolen from the Chuck Bronson movie "Ten to Midnight." In Bronson's movie the psycho gives a speech on how sick he is and how he'll be back because you can't lock up nuts forever. Of course, Bronson shoots the guy- end of movie. In "Cobra" the bad guy treats us to almost the exact same speech; but Stallone just can't shoot the guy. That would be too pat. How then does Sly dispose of the baddie? Let's just say the end takes place in an iron foundry with predictable results. However, the cherry on top that sets this film a cut above other wretched movies is the presence of Brigitte Neilsen. What a terrible actress! She plays a model and her fashion shoot montage is a scream. Gotta love the cheesy soundtrack too!

  Stallone was at the pinnacle of his career when he made this piece of dreck. He had just come off of the huge successes of "Rambo II" and "Rocky IV." "Cobra" was supposed to be his BIG movie for 1986 and maybe be the start of another franchise of sequels. It had a big budget and alot of expectations hanging on its success. When one considers what was expected of it and how completely it failed then it's not too hard to mention it among the worst movies ever made. One could make the case that Stallone's career never fully recovered from this fiasco.
  
  

• Get this DVD!

  
  By A1HUBEP5DJ6W51 on 1999-05-01
  While the film is typical 1980s right-wing nonsense, the director commentary featured on the DVD is beyond hilarious. Most of the time, the commentary on special editions is insightful or even fascinating, but this time around, the director seems so bored he is reduced to commenting on the Christmas decarations and Pepsi machines. However, if you must watch the film, I submit that the "romance" between Stallone and Nielsen is one of the worst ever captured on screen. Also, take note of the massive photo of then-President Reagan on the wall in the cop station.......need I say more?
  
  

• TERRIBLE SCREENPLAY

  
  By A2X27FQSHP418Y on 2000-05-09
  What makes me sad is Stallon,e being someone who fought so hard to get success and a screenwriter himself ("ROCKY") certainly knows when he is shooting a lousy script. But he goes for it anyway, giving us this terrible motion-picture, whre there's a gang of killers who wants a new order for something..A mere vehicle for actres Brigitte Nielses, I guess..
  
  

• Eating pizza with scissors. The Cobra style.

  
  By A1LJR5IS0B6ADX on 2006-06-12
  This movie is so bad that you have to love it, from the opening scene in the super market, to the motorcycle/car chase at the end of the movie. This movie has got it all. Sly is the archetype of a stale, tough on the outside, warm on the inside hero. The one liners are sick. For instance when the super market is threatened to be blown to pieces Sly says, "Go ahead, I don't shop here."
  
  As for Brigitte Nielsen, what a wonderful little (or tall) actress she is. I especially like the part in the parking garage, where she is fighting for her life. I found it all so believable. I really think she should have gotten an Oscar in 1986 for this movie. Why not? Judi Dench received an academy award for Shakespeare in Love and she was only in it for five minutes. Here we have eighty-seven minutes of sheer genius.
  
  Last but not least, I love the Bounty Hunter from the X-Files as the lead villain. What a wonderful job he did, because he had to really work outside his acting realm to be in this film. I also loved the Bounty Hunter's minions, all very upset blue-collar workers who wanted to be loved. So they joined a serial killer cult!! I love this movie! I love the Zombie Squad! I love the 80's music in this movie! Why can't Cobra just come over my house and have some Famous Amos cookies with me?!
  
  
  
• WARNING!! A CAN OF BEER IS SHOT IN THIS FILM!!!
  By AJNF7OEAN26K on 2005-04-10
  Do the math-- a renegade cop fortuitously named "Cobretti" + this same cop cutting freezer-stored pizza with scissors + an ax-clinking cult willing to bring about the "New World Order" by butchering Peter Cetera in a parking garage + a homicidal maniac who spews a pint of saliva with every utterance of the word "PIG!" in the gripping climax - any semblance of acting skills = THE DEFINITIVE WORK IN THE BRIGITTE NIELSEN LIBRARY!!
  As soon as the 20th Anniversary Edition lands in theaters, do like Flair and...WALK THAT AISLE!!!
  
  
• One of the worst movies I ever seen
  By AMJIFUYTHDBL7 on 2006-04-24
  I didn't even get through half the movie before I turned it off. It was boring, poor quality, cheesy, and the acting sucked. I was so fustrated with the movie, I sold it on ebay the next day. I am a HUGE Stallone fan and I couldn't believe this movie was such a disapointment.
  
  
• HOW TO WASTE MONEY ON A RIDICULOUS MOVIE
  By A29HTTO0G2R8BI on 2000-08-14
  Cobra (1986)

  Cobra is a God awful movie that really sets the standard for lousy action films.

  The story is strange and goes absolutely nowhere.Some killer called "The NightSlasher" kills multiple people with a very sharp and lethal knife.Marion Cobretti (Sylvester Stallone) is also known as "Cobra",and sets out to destroy the "NightSlasher".

  This film is sooo bad it's kind of hard to describe.The screenplay (written by Stallone) is horrible,and has tons of plot holes and has unbelieveably stupid dialog.The story goes absolutely nowhere.The characters are terribly developed and are strictly zero dimensional.And Brigette Nielson is a horrid actress.

  Beyond that,Cobra is filled with an incredibly cheesy and irritating 80s soundtracks.Director George Pan Cosmatos has to be the most serious problem with the film.He doesn't know where he wants the film to go,and his direction is just soooo weak,it makes the film predictable,slow,and boring.

  Cosmatos gave us some really good films over the years (Rambo 2, Leviathan,etc),but this is probably his worst film.

  Cobra is also very boring due to the slow-paced plot and Cosmatos' incredibly weak direction.The action scenes are also very stupid and brainless.Such as when Cobra nukes two axe- wielding killers at his home and his boss and fellow cops say he still doesn't have proof that the killings are being done by more than one person.Cobra's sunglasses are also horrible looking.

  Overall,Cobra could've been a good movie.It could've been a Stallone favorite.It has VERY few redeeming qualties.Brian Thompson is excellent as the "NightSlasher",the finale is pretty intense,and the beginning is superb.Still,that can't save this dreck.

  It's easy to see why Cobra 2 was never planned.This movie stunk up the house real bad!
  
  

• Is there a cliche this movie doesn't cover?
  By AR9RJMR9C9H40 on 2000-11-06
  Why do I do this to myself? Stay up late at night and watch horrible action movies on HBO, that is. It seems like each one gets worse than the last. But "Cobra" is about as low as they can go.

  Stallone demonstrates quite admirably why action movie stars should not write their own screenplays. From the "maverick in the police department" to the "female lead who falls in love with a guy who continually and recklessly endangers her life" to the "treacherous partner cop-gone-bad" to the "one man vs. an army" of the climactic shootout, the plot might interest a sleeping zombie. Maybe that's his target audience, as the brutal senselessness of the movie could only escape the undead. Although even zombies will get a little nauseated at the retro-80s soundtrack.

  Maybe I've been spoiled by "The Matrix" -- no, scratch that, even the memory of "Rambo" and "Rocky" was enough to ruin this film. I think I'm going to go into my room and cry now.
  
  

• Forgettable, even for Stallone
  By on 2001-04-30
  The first 10 minutes of this movie present a pretty entertaining introduction to the title character, Marion "the Cobra" Cobretti. The reflecto sunglasses, the laser scoped gun, the cobra insignia on the gun's handle, the match dangling from his pouty lips (I thought that went out in the 50's?). After those first 10 minutes, however, I had a hard time maintaining my concentration on this movie.

  In 1985, Stallone and Schwarzenegger went mano a mano with two war superhero movies, "Rambo" and "Commando," two of my all time favorites for that genre. In 1986, I was hyped for the round two with "Cobra" and "Raw Deal" fighting it out for the detective superhero award. Well, both movies rank among my all time least favorites for ol' Hanz and Franz. How can a woman as good looking as Brigette Nielsen be such a bore playing a model? And why does Stallone play the Cobra like Rocky Balboa with a speech impediment? (I know that is redundant). I guess he thinks the shy-guy routine will somehow allow this 2 dimensional character to cast an actual shadow. We'll never know. You'll be best off skipping this one at the rental outlet.
  
  

• Should be no stars
  By A2YK2MBP8KH1FD on 2005-05-28
  I saw this movie when I was 16 years old and even at that tender age knew the film was a disaster of a movie. Stallone's career really went down from this point onwards until the excellent Cop Land.
  
  I must admit, however, I liked the car Cobretti drove (and subsequently trashed). Hard to believe this dross was based on a novel and Stallone actually bought to turn into a screenplay. Hmmmmmmmmmmm.
  
  
• A true GUY movie in every sense!
  By ABHTIZPK2F7RP on 2003-08-19
  It is amazing how every review i have read hates this movie. I can't agree with them. This movie is a classic 80's action movie. This movie has it all: a cool cop with a slick car and awesome fire power, a hot chick, and a pyscho killer with a big a** knife. This movie also has some of the best one liners, my favories:

  " Go ahead , i don't shop here"

  " Your a disease, amd i am the cure"

  " you know what your problem is...your too violent"

  " this is where the law stops.. and i start"

  I could name all the classic lines in this but i don't want to spoil it. It also features Reno Santoni who was in the first "Dirty Harry". You either love this movie or hate it to death. I grew up with it and i have it proudly in my collection.It is on my list of the 10 best cop movies. Stallone's best cop movie since "Nighthawks". This Cobra packs bite.
  
  

• A classic action movie...
  By on 2004-05-15
  This is a classic Sylvester Stallone action movie. It's one of the best he ever made. Cobra was mostly known for the number of people killed during the movie. It far exceeded any previous record for an action movie...bordering on the comical. Some of the things you'll remember... The match he keeps in his mouth. His awesome gun. His Mercury which is painfully destroyed during the movie. And the most memorable moment is when he meets up with "Night Slasher" (Brian Thompson) at the end and gets an earful about the judicial system. "They'll say I'm insane. Won't they...PIG!?" If ever there was a classic piece of film it's this encounter. Me and my friends still joke today about how spittle and sweat comes from his mouth when he says, "PIG!". It's hilarious. That alone is worth owning this movie. In all, it's typical of 80's action films. Sylvester's films always seem to have a fair amount of cheese in them. It's a given. At the same time tho, they don't make films like this anymore. The days of the action hero seem over, but they can be relived with movies like Cobra.
  
  
• THIS MOVIE ROCKS
  By AFB2YKKZO439A on 2005-02-15
  Cobra is an all time favourite of mine, I can't believe the bad reviews. This film I think is well made, it's exciting. I love this film.
  
  I think Sly and Brigette Nielsen had wonderful chemisty together, there intrieging to watch. Brigette is wonderful to watch, a fine actress. Slyvester is cool as usual. I everything about this film, the music, the story, the actors. Brian Thompson is a favourite of mine. He plays the psycho well, especially the attack on Ingrid in the hospital.
  
  So if you haven't seen this film, please don't believe the negitive reviews, this film is a classic in my opinion.
  
  
• Is there a plot to this movie? "Yeah, but it's just a little one."
  By AVQJD41PLPOOQ on 2005-07-25
  As if ROCKY IV wasn't horrible enough!
  
  If Sylvester Stallone was so desperate to play an action cop again, I would have preferred a sequel to NIGHTHAWKS, a great New York City cop movie!
  
  
• This is the kind of garbage that sunk Stallone's career
  By AL4MKKO24563R on 2005-12-20
  The "plot" of this massive disaster is simple: Stallone's Detective Cobretti must track down an army of serial killers before they track down and kill witness/girlfriend Brigette Nielsen. After several dozen murders, Stallone tracks the killers down and blows them all away (except for the one he hangs on a hook and burns to death). The End.
  
  Total Recall showed how extreme violence could be used to produce an imaginative, entertaining film. Cobra shows how extreme violence can be used to produce a multi-million dollar mess that makes you wonder if Darwin was wrong. It's basically a star vehicle slasher film during which victim after hapless victim is paraded in front of the screen to be slaughtered in the name of forwarding the "plot."
  
  With a resume filled with junk like this over the past two decades, it's no wonder Stallone's career has gone down the toilet.
  
  
• this "cobra" has no teeth and no taste
  By A1MK02HC440QT8 on 2006-01-22
  this is sly's try at the dirty harry role and man does he miss the mark. he just doesen't have the moxie to do it. he gritts his teeth, scowles,talks in a wisper,and shows no respect for anyone includeing his bosses which is always the case in these movies. they put him on a case of a murder cult lead by the most slimey killer you could want,but thats all no real part to play just a bad bad bad guy. cobra is just as sick as he will take out anyone to get the bad guys. a very unpleasent movie that at under 90 min. is still to long. even when they show him working he never does any of the things a real cop would do ,he just looks mad shows a picture and all to the worst soundtrack of any 80's action film. a waste from start to end.
  
  
• Sexy Stallone at his best!
  By on 1999-03-15
  This movie is so underrated! I can't get enough of Sly with those tinted glasses and that toothpick. The action is spectacular and there are some good social comments about society too that really make you think. I love the car he drives and that stubble drives me wild! I have'nt been this hot and bothered since "Party at Kitty and Studs". Sometimes, me and my girlfriends will rent this and a Stephen Segal movie and just squeal the night away.
  
  
• Vicious and violent.
  By on 1999-08-17
  Considering Sylvester Stallone thinks guns should be banned for citizens of the US, I don't understand how he could allow himself to be in such a film that glorifies violence, killing and mayhem. This film should be banned.
  
  
• I would give this a big 0 if I could!
  By on 1999-11-28
  This movie was Stallone's worst. It was cheesy, the acting was terrible & the effects even at the time were just bad. Stallone is not one of my favorites, but even Cop Land was better than this excuse for a movie! Stockard Channing really must have been desperate to be in this thing. To go from Grease to Cobra is real doward spiral. Cobra should have been on MST3K as bad as it is.
  
  
• So it's stupid.
  By A26KW32Z05KM7O on 2001-07-17
  Yes,it is dumb,the plot sucks,the acting sucks,there is no suspense despite what other reviewers say.And,quite obviously the screenplay sucked..I own this on dvd because i love fun movies and this is one of those...People,This is not ben-hur or Citizen Kane.....just a fun,stupid movie.

  The dialogue that deals with society is pretty good...but it barely scratches the surface of things.This was a vehicle for "Brigitte Neilsen" who is not a very good actress in my opinion.The love scene is absolutely horrendus(How could she fall for a guy who deliberately puts her in danger?)

  Not bad picture on the dvd in component video,but the sound is awful even with 2 sub-woofers.

  A laughable commentary track by George P. Cosmatos..Very slow and he seems to get real bored all of a sudden so decides to tell us that he likes pepsi and gummi bears....Now,he's a good director but this was a poor job and he knows it.

  But for guys and girls who like fun movies...go ahead and buy it,you'll like it.

  A.P.L
  
  

• BLOODY ACTION
  By on 1999-03-09
  I first saw this movie when I was about 5. I've grwon up watching violent movies and this is one of my favorites from my earliest memories.
  
  
• A pretty bad flick that's even worse on DVD
  By AYMM2KV2UJDZ on 2000-07-04
  I reviewed this film quite a some time ago and gave it 2 stars out of 5 (which means seriously flawed and is only recommended for hardcore fans of the genre.Otherwise,steer clear).However,after viewing this DVD,this movie is worse than I originally thought.A while ago,me and my friend Ted went to BlockBuster to rent some DVD's.Ted owns a DVD player,so I went to his house.The DVD's we rented were Small Soldiers,Friday The 13th, Phantasm and this.Ted absolutely loves this movie, so just to be nice,I watched it with him.However, he didn't enjoy it very much because the DVD had some VERY irritating problems.The picture quality is horrible.Some scenes are difficult to see coz the picture has a dark tint to it.The sound is bad.On the DVD we rented,the actors voices were hard to hear has some of the gunfire and sound F/X.There was also a hiss that would interrupt every once in a while.It wasn't loud or constant but still.The extras are fairly decent,but the director's commentary isn't a commentary at all. George Pan Cosmatos is silent throughout the entire film and doesn't speak once about it. Overall,I'd recommend you avoid this.If you must see this dull flick,rent the VHS tape.The DVD is purely and simply awful.
  
  
• Not for those who care for criminals' rights!
  By on 2000-12-15
  It's no wonder people who care for rights of criminals more than the rights of victims hate this movie. Imagine that - here's a cop who not only says openly what he thinks of criminals and "civilized judges" but even puts his words into action. The "human rights" (criminal rights, that is) people called this movie "fascist" (it's their favorite epiteth for anything that's not compatible with their way of "thinking"). Don't listen to that babble - the same people hate "Dirty Harry" and don't bash it only because it's a classic that they, being cowards, don't dare attack. "Cobra" isn't a classic yet (hopefully it will be), so it's a great object for an attack.

  I'm not sure about USA these days, but boy, my country could sure use a few Cobras! Buy the movie, buy "Dirty Harry" and don't forget Heinlein's "Starship Troopers" (not the dreadful film by Verhoeven) for a grim - though, admittedly, in "Cobra's" case, often too simplistic and too direct - comment on today's world... One more thing - "Cobra" has a superb soundtrack! A true fantastic voyage to the 1980s... I normally prefer orchestral scores, but Cobra's soundtrack, consisting mostly of songs (and the excellent orchestral opening theme) is one of few so great compilations of such music. Don't forget to get the soundtrack in addition to the DVD!
  
  

• Laughably ridiculous.
  By A3FIGKRGCPXSSQ on 2002-01-01
  Oh man,

  I'd have to humbly say the only advantage to enjoying this movie is being a twelve year old seeing it for the first time. But that would be a twelve year old of 1986 actually experiencing it in the movies. Of which the twelve year olds today would probably need a lot more "eye-candy" to keep them amused. But boy, is this movie rib-crushingly hilarious to the grown up of right now.

  Catch me back in '86,'87 as a kid watching this movie with my jaws agape and you'd never believe I'd have grown up to laugh so hard at every TNT "Movies For Guys. . ." showing. This is such a fun "Dude" movie. It's so ridiculous and ubelievable - not to mention 80's cheese - you can't help but watch it every time it's on.

  But you have to give Sly just a wee bit of credit. Pulling off that "Ode to Eastwood" thing was probably such a novel idea at the pitch meeting, it truly is a shame we never saw more of the omnipotent, invincible and insatiably charming Marion Cobretti again.

  Yeah.

  But anyway. . .so what it's dumb. So what it lacks the believability of Rambo III. And so what if you need plot, character development, consistency and story! This is definitely the movie for you if you think wrestling is real.

  And two stars? Hey, man. . .I had to give it something. One star just wouldn't be fair for the accountability of nostalgia.

  Godfather? Definitely not. But hey, neither was The Toxic Avenger. And I dare you to find a living soul that's actually seen The Toxic Avenger and not LOVED it!

  So there it is. Two stars for the timeless COBRA. One 'cause it needed one for the review and the other 'cause I was twelve.

  Take care.
  
  

• Disappointing because it could have been so good
  By A3GA09FYFKL4EY on 2005-06-20
  Stallone plays a rogue cop on the trail of a serial killer, which could have presented us with a gripping adventure, but too much is left unclear. The villains seem to belong to some sort of neo-nazi or white supremacy group, but their motivations are never explored. Why are they killing people? What do they expect to gain? Why aren't they making demands of the cops? The whole movie is just an excuse for Stallone to rack up the body count. Terribly disappointing since Sly IS a good actor and can do so much better. Rent the Rambo or Rocky series instead
  
  
• Cobra is the disease, there is no cure!
  By A3DY46ZABF4CMQ on 2005-12-29
  In the mid-80's, Sylvester Stallone was one of Hollywood's biggest money making actors, and a gauranteed box office draw. He was given a green light by producers to go over the script and make changes the way he saw fit. One of these scripts that Stallone was interested in was called Beverly Hills Cop. The script mixed humor with action; Stallone, however, wasn't keen on comedy so he turned the script into a darker, more action-oriented script. The result was that the producers decided to stick with the original script and give the starring role in Cop to a rising young African American comedian/actor named Eddie Murphy; Stallone, on the other hand, was given the boot. He, however, had finished revising the script, changed the title to Cobra, brought his then wife Brigitte Nielsen to co-star, and filmed it on his own with George Cosmatos, who had directed him in Rambo: First Blood Part 2, as director.
  
  Cobra doesn't come close to Beverly Hills Cop. It was a critical disaster despite doing good business at the box office.
  
  The story is about a cool cop named Marion Cobretti, so much for Axel Foley, who is known as Cobra. He wears jeans and a pair of dark sunglasses, lives in a slum, drives an awesome car, carries a gun with a cobra drawn on it, tosses one-liners around like frisbies, hardly smiles, and chews on a matchstick (how cool is that?!). He is hired to protect a model, played by Nielsen, who witnessed a group of killers commit their grizzly crime.
  
  The films follows Cobra and the model as they escape from the gang to nowhere in particular. And that's where the movie goes: nowhere. In other words, Cobra is plotless. Why are the killers doing what they're doing? To take over the world and start a new order, but why?!
  
  On the other hand, the action sequences are unrealistic (Cobra's car flying out of the second floor of a parking structure and taking off like nothing happened), but they are cool just like the movie's main character.
  
  Not really recommended, unless you love Stallone and 'cool' action movies (together, that is!).
  
  C
  
  
• Psycho?
  By A24N7JWWBH6MFV on 2006-06-07
  A "get what you pay for" Dirty Harry clone in which Sly tosses out a few too many tough guy one-liners, basically. Perhaps I'm over-analyzing the thing, but watch closely as buttoned-down Andrew Robinson, best known for his "Scorpio" serial sniper in Clint's original vigilante cop hit referenced above, has a moment when, after being accosted by Sly's Cobretti, snarls, "HE'S the psycho!!" A clever intentional line? who knows? lol
  
  
• King Cobra
  By AWR78XVWD4SSX on 2008-05-22
  A friend of mine once stated that Cobra was "one of the greatest works of art ever committed to celluloid". He's dead now, so I feel okay saying that his comment was patently absurd. Cobra is, in fact, the greatest achievement in human history. More to the point, watching Cobra is like peering into the mind of God.
  Following all the movie's plot twists and turns is certainly a test of mental acuity, but under the delicate helmsmanship of director George Cosmatos, even a dullard can expect 87 minutes of uninterrrupted rapture. Based on Paula Gosling's criminally Nobel-overlooked novel "Fair Game", Cobra explores the fragile struggle between civilized society's need for a humane justice system versus its innate lust for exacting revenge. In an increasingly violent, hostile, and lonely world, where apocalyptic serial-killing cults are allowed to infiltrate our power structures (in this case, the police force), slaughter our pop icons in parking garages (Peter Cetera), and clink their axes together in abandoned warehouses, where do we draw the line between cruelty and justice? Where Cosmatos stands on this issue is purely speculative, as he tackles the films denouement with characteristic subtlety and restraint: Cobra impales the maniacal cult leader on a hook conveyor to be immolated in a roaring smelting furnace. It's an ending that will no doubt continue to inspire spirited discourse amongst filmgoers and ethicists for decades to come.
  At the center of all this wondrous mayhem is Sylvester Stallone as the hard-boiled "zombie squad" toiler Marion "Cobra" Cobretti. And, surprise surprise!, he is once again at the top of his craft. Here he revolutionizes thespianism with a brilliant new school of character development whereby the actor bypasses the diverse landscape of emotions one would expect from his/her character and instead tenaciously embraces a look of fatigue, angst, and confusion throughout the film's entirety. It's a talent only the likes of Burt Reynolds and a young Dolph Lundgren could ever hope to master.
  Need romance? Cobra has it in spades. The chemistry between Stallone and damsel-in-distress Brigitte Nielsen recalls classic Tracy-Hepburn and DeVito-Perlman. This is never more evident than in the infamous diner scene, in which Nielsen squirts a viscous lagoon of ketchup on her french fries before an exasperated Cobretti. This stunning use of condiments only hints at the unbearably thick sexual tension between the protagonists and always lights a fire in my shorts.
  The only sad note in this film : wardrobe director Tom Bronson's mind-boggling decision to saddle Cobra's partner Gonzalez (played by an unbelievably adequate Reni Santoni) with a tweed cap throughout most of the action. Yes, the dapper fez lends some street-cred and authenticity to the role, but it isn't until a shootout near the end of the film that the heaven that is this man's gossamer follicles are exposed! Shame on you, Mr. Bronson. Anything less than the unadulterated glory that is Mr. Santoni's vibrant plumage is a crime in my book!!!
  Aspiring filmmakers take heed: commit "Cobra" to memory...or take up bricklaying.
  
  
  
• One of Stallone's best action movies
  By A2QRB6L1MCJ53G on 2001-01-22
  Like most of Stallone's action movies, "Cobra" is an exciting, action packed movie. Sylvester Stallone stars as Cobra, a cop who is well known for tracking down and killing psychopathic killers who are on the loose killing innocent people. While tracking down these serial killers, Cobra is also protecting a woman (Brigitte Nielsen) from danger by carrying her with him.

  "Cobra" might not be one of the Stallone movies that you hear a lot about such as "Rambo" or "Rocky," but that doesn't mean that i's not a great movie. "Cobra" is full of spectacular driving, fighting, and shooting action sequences while Cobra does his action packed job by showing the criminals that Cobra is as deadly as a cobra.

  I recommend anybody who likes action movies with tons of exciting action sequences to get "Cobra." It might not get the credit for it, but "Cobra" is one of Sylvester Stallone's best action movies.
  
  

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